Don't Mince Words


Green eggs and knee brace

Posted on July 31, 2011 by Marna

I know I’ve threatened, after sampling the lack-luster Santa Barbara dating pool, to go back to Los Angeles to date.  I finally did and I can safely say I’m so happy I adopted a dog for companionship.

My new target market is old guys – or men who have kids that are off to college and they are safely divorced and possibly ready for another long-term relationship.  This means 50+.  Past mid-life and dating bimbos.  This guy seemed like a catch right down to the fact he was from New England.

We met in Santa Monica and I was sure I’d recognize him because he had a Ned Flanders (Simpsons) mustache.  But to be on the safe side, because you never know with pictures, I told him to look for the tall redhead.  I know I shouldn’t be ageist, but I really wish I could be a cougar again.  And I know I’m older and I have no room to talk.  But Ned, 56,  wore a washed out yellow polo, super light blue jeans, and bright white sneakers.  My favorite accessory was a knee brace which he chose to wear on the outside of his jeans.

I tried to let all that slide.  I ordered a spinach omelette.  He had a club which he ate while he talked about himself.  I smiled and nodded secretly thankful that Dixie was in the car waiting to bail me out.  I hugged and cheek kissed him goodbye 90 minutes after our brunch and dove into my car.

Three hours and 90 miles later, Dixie and I were home.  “We’re never doing that again,” I told the dog as we settled on the couch to spend the evening watching Netflix.

2 to “Green eggs and knee brace”

  1. Wall Street Pete says:

    The second I turn into a Geezer, I want you to tell me what corner to wait on, and then run me down with your car.

  2. Leta says:

    Good grief! I also have been trying to date in L.A. again. A bigger fish pond indeed! But, unfortunately, all the guys in my age group (or within 10 yrs. of such) are recovering drug addicts (ewe) or very out of shape with, a desire to share all the gory details of their multiple health problems. Yuck!
    I’m also loving my new pup! Such a smart, fit, wise guy! =D



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  • About Marna

    Marna’s writing career started as a Pentagon intern. Early exposure to $500 toilet seat press releases made her appreciate creative nonfiction. Now she has more than 25 years of senior-level marketing and communications success working with Fortune 100 companies, government, nonprofits, small businesses, startups, and agencies.

    Stats: 369 Posts, 128 Comments

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