She minces no words.

Dont Mince Words


Posted on December 02, 2005 by Marna

I got over that metrosexual man thing more than a decade ago when I realized my husband used more hair products than I did. It wasn’t the ‘80s, after all. So when I met a man who said he was in touch with his inner lesbian and he’d come over and fix my furnace on our second date, I had to say yes.

He showed up sporting a thrift store chic workman shirt with a “Todd” name patch and “Greco Heating and Air Conditioning” above his pocket. I giggled as he came in the door and hugged me. When he sat down on the sofa he squirmed around.

“What’s this?” he asked.

“You are probably sitting on one of my crazy pillows,” I answered.

He pulled out a stuffed rooster from his back pocket. “I could of brought you flowers, but I thought you’d like cock instead,” he said.

A sense of humor, good, but can he fix a furnace? No, but he spent 45 minutes trying, which is about how long my ex-husband used to spend in the bathroom doing his hair.

I’ll take cock any day.

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  • About Marna

    Marna’s writing career started as a Pentagon intern. Early exposure to $500 toilet seat press releases made her appreciate creative nonfiction. Now she has more than 25 years of senior-level marketing and communications success working with Fortune 100 companies, government, nonprofits, small businesses, startups, and agencies.

    Stats: 377 Posts, 132 Comments

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