Don't Mince Words

Tag: date

  • The angry couponer

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    I’m embarrassed to admit my first date of the year was in December, but after living in Santa Barbara it’s easy to give up on dating.  As a distraction from the fleas I was dealing with, I agreed to meet Mike for lunch.  When he suggested Ruby Tuesday’s, I knew I was going to get…

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  • Hey there, whatcha doin’?

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    I willingly admit that most women are batshit crazy, men are assholes, and collectively, dating is hard at any age, anywhere.  But I’m telling you, the men outdo themselves in California (legalized marijuana?).  I used to think I was just perimenapausal and I was losing interest in men, but the truth is, each interaction I…

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  • Blue balls will be ringing

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    It’s that most wonderful time of the year….when single men realize they are alone.  Apparently when you combine that with home for the holidays, you have the formula for hot and horny. About six months ago I was contacted by “Jack” because he was considering taking a job in Santa Barbara.  He was currently in…

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  • It’s a small town (after all)

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    When I was signing my lease, the assistant, a lifetime native of Santa Barbara, warned me, “Whatever you do, just be nice to everyone.  Even ex-boyfriends.  This town is small.”  I realize this falls under The Golden Rule crap my parents taught me. I haven’t seen The Schnauzer since the infamous hot tub/back shaving incident. …

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  • Far from the Madden-ing crowd

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    Have you ever been on a date and you think to yourself, “something isn’t right here.” After a good night’s sleep, I’m ready to Sunday morning quarterback my Saturday night date. I made the seven-mile schlep to Hollywood in record time. Going to Hollywood on a Saturday night is a chore that has to have…

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